Day 2

Today, together with another new comer, I have an informal briefing of how my departments work. We chatted about a lot of things, of how the departments work, of its contribution to the company, etc. I didn’t manage to grab most of the points, as it’s overly “financialitic” for me, but the manager made one very clear point to me.

No Development in this specific IT Department.

I was totally stunned at that time. He continued that we’ll be focusing more on business analysis. In other words, I’ll be required to truly understand the business model before suggesting any module to be added.

I don’t mind doing that.. but… with my current finance knowledge… my dear company… I afraid that you have hired me for (almost) nothing T_T if there is anything I can be sure to be at least better than my peers, that is my IT knowledge. Now that you mentioned you will hardly need it… well…

I know that everything can be learnt. I know that there will be a very steep learning curve for me. I know that moving out from my comfort zone will be beneficial for me. I just really hope that I can contribute something along the way. I really wish for that.

I’m still in a very labile mood… I just realize that working is really a big turning point for me… from student to worker… and I still haven’t gotten the right mindset for it. For the last 16 years of study, I always had the mindset like “this is temporary… I just need to survive for 3 or 4 years and it’ll be over.” Even during my IA days, I will have the same temporary-thingy mindset. I can always see the upper bound. But now… I can’t. There is no time upper bound to this job thing… and I’m somehow lost the meaning of it.

I’m not sure if I could continue to write anything regarding about my job T_T More and more things become confidential and I shouldn’t break it if I don’t want to get into trouble…

In the middle of finding motivation,
Erlin.D